Guess who just handed in her manuscript?
Go on, guess!
That's right! This girl! The girl who has been leading you on for the past 6 months with tiny morsels of information regarding the book. After the multiple "almost done" and "just one more edit" I have finally submitted my manuscript for its initial submission!
I am SO happy and excited!
I'm not going to lie, dear reader, it's been tough fighting you guys off and keeping you at bay.
Here's why:
There is a very strong romanticized conception of a writer (thank you to all of the chick flicks out there who have ruined it for the people who live in the real world). When I tell people that I am writing a book they usually imagine me sitting at my desk, looking out the window and typing gracefully with sufficient pauses, accentuated by a coy smile every now and then. These smiles are, of course, because of my characters when they say something witty or charming. Also, while I am writing, I have beside me a pipping cup of tea or coffee (butler's choice), an array of fruits and sandwiches and I am dressed in casual and comfortable attire.
Also, I start writing early in the day and continue to do so until dinner time, uninterrupted. Sounds wonderful, doesn't it?
Now, I want to rip that image into pieces and replace it with the following pie chart:
That is the factual description of what my days as a writer consist of. I would, however, increase the crying section of the pie chart, but the rest is pretty accurate.
Note: Thank you best-memes.com. You guys really get me.
This, dear reader, is the craziness that has been consuming me for the past seven months. I have been at this book, tooth and nail. I've written it in good hair days and bad hair days. I have worked on it in sickness and in health. I have developed several bad habits like insomnia, weight gain, lack of exercise, lack of socialization, depression, talking to my self and refusing to touch the laundry until I reach my word count for the week (sorry hubster).
Moreover, the editing part of the book has been exhausting. I have gone over sentences for so long that the English language started to sound like gibberish and words like 'initial' and 'counting' began to look absurd in sentences. Even now I have the urge to replace them with some other words.
I write at odd times of the night and sometimes feel ridiculously upset when I want to write a scene out, but the words won't let me. I skip meals because I am too engrossed in my scenes and feel annoyed when I have to delete whole chapters. I'm constantly thinking about ways to change up the plot and spend hours on the internet, distracted by Facebook and other social media sites, trying to find a character's name. What I am trying to say, dear reader, is that some days the writing works and the other days it doesn't. Nothing is conventional about it: not the hours, not the pay and not the method.
But I love it. I cannot explain to you the joy I feel when I realize that I have arranged words in a sequence that I am happy with. It's like every other job. Some parts of it are hard and others work out okay. I'm not telling you this because I want your sympathy. I am telling you this because I want you to understand what happens behind the scenes.
It's hard, dear reader, The behind-the-scenes in a creative field is a very hard world to live in, especially if you know that there is a very high chance of you staying behind the scenes forever and never getting the appreciation for your hard work.
So, I would like to take this moment and appreciate all the hard work that happens behind the scenes. Just because we don't see it, know about it or understand it doesn't mean that it's not there. I would like to applaud every single individual hidden behind the curtain and tell him/her that you are just as important, fabulous and hardworking as the people shining on the red carpet.
Now, with the submission of my manuscript, I hope that with your love and support, dear reader,
I will be able to achieve my spot on the stage and make my way out from behind the curtain. And if I stumble and fall, my resolve will not waver because of the people who surround me and empower me everyday to fight for my dream. You were with me when I didn't have a blog or a manuscript and you supported me nonetheless. And for that I want to thank you. It is because of you that I will continue to fight and work hard to accomplish my dream.
As for you, dear reader, you are close to my heart: the listener of my deepest secrets and the wind beneath my wings. Thank you for standing by me silently and strongly and please do believe me that I cherish your time and your loyalty. Because without you, my words would be nothing more than floating letters. Thank you for weighing them down with meaning and love.
Until next time. Smiles up and doubts down.
isheeza
P.S: I'm out for the next two weeks on Europe Tours so no blog posts! Will update when I get back! =D
